Birthday Candy Poem
You may not have grown up on the corner of CLARK and FIFTH AVENUE but your living life CAREFREE and with MOUNDS of ALMOND JOY. On your way you met BABY RUTH who loves a BIT OF HONEY and you always made sure it was GOOD AND PLENTY, as a result you had four GOOBERS and a KIT KAT named peaches.
Now, your favorite past time is Nascar --you're here, no it's not O'HENRY or MR. GOODBAR, but oh what's his name, you know-WHATAMACALLIT, oh that's right Jeff Gordon. So every PAYDAY you're on a shopping SPREE buying up all his goods. Sometimes we wonder if you like it for the speed or maybe just for the HOT TAMMALES.
NOW AND LATER, you knew you were going to get a little older, as an indication your bones are beginning to KRACKER. You sometime find yourself in a CRUNCH when you look in the mirror and feel you're a little CHUNKY, and during those times we love your response "Don't point your BUTTERFINGER, you bunch of AIRHEADS if you looked this good at 50 you would have to be from MARS.
Here's another version:
This is "the" birthday! (Bar None)!
(Now and Later) you've lived life (Good and Plenty). Now when you get up in the morning the bones (Krackel). You look in the mirror and feel a little (Chunky) (Snicker! Snicker!) Too many (Whoppers) (Snicker! Snicker!) You are definitely feeling the (Crunch!) Your (Sugar Babies) are almost in college, etc. Your (Baby Ruth) is even in school! You are feeling like a real (Zero). You've even called your mother (Whatchamacallit). So, buck up (Name). We are your friends and not all of us are (Nerds) ... just one of two of us! Your (Pay Day) is coming! You are worth a (100 Grand) to us. We are telling you----you are special! You are a real (Power House). Some say an (Atomic Fire Ball) (Hugs and Kisses) to you from all of your younger friends. We love you! We know the (Skor)! We are your (Lifesavors)!